So, have you ever been booed?

How about at a bridal shower?

A few years ago, at a bridal shower that I attended, we were asked to give my friend advice.

So, I actually really thought about this. I was probably only three years into marriage at the time. And, I believe I started off something like. “Sometimes, you have to bite your tongue and let the man be the man.

So, I didn’t get all boos, but I got some “Really? What? Are you serious?”

But, I finished and proceeded to tell the importance of submission in marriage and allowing your man to lead his household as it is intended.

And, I think some of the bridal shower attendees accepted it. And, that is my theme to anyone now at a bridal shower.

Submission in Marriage, Really?

Look, I hear you too. If you have Control Freak Tendencies like me and think that you are the brains in the relationship, then I know you are looking at this post sideways.

 Trust me, I feel you when your temperatures rise when we thinxk of submission in marriage. I am nearly 13 years in, and sometimes, I am still like really, God.

Submission is painful, it feels like death. And, in some instances, it is. But, the revelation that God gave me just some few years ago is that my earthly marriage is truly a reflection of our relationship with Christ. How many times, do we rebel and fail to submit to our Lord and Savior. How many times have we chosen not to trust Jesus, when we promised we would? That’s an ouch for me.

So, I encourage you to just take one step at a time. Go ahead and be adventurous.How about you let him pick the movie? Listen to his side, without saying “but”. Listen, submission in marriage can have benefits for you too. Here are three that I thought about.


Submission is Your Conscious Choice

Submission in marriage is not a sign of weakness, but it is a conscious choice. You are choosing to lay down your way, creating an easier path for that hubby of yours to lead. And, that should be a feeling of empowerment as well.

Submission Helps You Develop Fruits of the Spirit

Patience and self-control is definitely what comes on top of mind here. But, you may find that there is so much more that you can gain from choosing submission in your marriage.

Galatians 5:22-23 tells us,

22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 [a]gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.

Self-control is knowing that you have the ability to do something, but you are able to refrain from doing it.

. That’s complete power and reliance on prayer. With my husband, I feel the most comfortable to share my thoughts, dreams and opinions. There are times though, that we can come to an impasse. When I find myself in moments, where my tone is a little ungodly and I just want to go against the grain. I am often convicted immediately by the Holy Spirit and reminded of the last name that I AGREED to carry.

I don’t know if your husband is a God-fearing man or not. And, I don’t know what he is asking you to submit to. But, if he loves the Lord and what he is asking is not contradicting the Word, why not trust him?

If it was the wrong decision, it may help him to see better. Don’t go back and throw that in his face though. Show kindness to your husband. Take this time to pray for him and love on him even more.

Submission Can Lead to Appreciation

But, you know what is great about letting your husband lead your household, the appreciation that you get. There was one instance,  I submitted to a big decision that my husband wanted to do.

Marcus wanted to get a new car, and I was not feeling it. Yet, I decided to take the plunge into submission and said okay. So, we got the car. Once the car was in our possession, I will never forget him saying to me “Thank You”.

  It was just one of the sweetest and heartfelt appreciation that I ever received. It was a sign that he knew that I trusted him. And, it is great feeling to be trusted. Plus, I ended taking over the car as my own, because I loved it so much, haha!

Submission in Christian Marriage Can Be A Blessing to You

The scripture passage that I leave you with is Ephesians 5:25 – 33.


Hey, we are honoring the Lord, when we have our husbands in the rightful place. And, you know what I am so thankful that God has given me someone, who wants to lead my home and take care of me. Just one less thing I am not worried about.



What advice would you share to a newlywed? What are some things that you put over in the hand of your husband and what was the outcome?

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Submission in Christian Marriage


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